Child's Play
by Dr Blanche Mottershead
Summary: River steels a device that ends up shrinking her and the doctor the six year old versions of them selves. How will Amy and Rory cope with the bickering children? read and review please.


Child's Play

The couple slammed the Tardis doors behind them and the Doctor raced up to the control panel.

"Where to?" he shouted. River grinned as she pressed her back against the doors which were shuddering against her, the angry voices of the Silurians leaking through them.

"Anywhere!" she exclaimed. The Doctor grinned and slammed the lever down and the Tardis gave a great shaking jolt as she launched herself into the space-time continuum.

When she stabilised, happily drifting around New Earths outer solar system, the Doctor look at River, the hint of a smile shadowing his lips as he gazed at his wife in her highly arousing, too tightly fitting thief's outfit. She was all black and tight and sexy, her wild curls pulled back into a bushy pony-tale, green eyes glittering.

"Now then Dr Song." He said, turning his attention back to the red velvet bag in her hands. "What have you stolen this time?" she grinned at him. "I presume it is something highly coveted and rather dangerous."

"Of course sweetie." She smiled. "All my favourite items are." Reaching into her bag she pulled out a great glowing orb. It seemed to be made of tiny interwoven glass and gold fibers, and inside were thousands upon thousands of intricate glass tubes, each with a glowing red liquid running through it. The Doctors eyes widened, inside them, swirled a mixture or awe, curiosity and fear.

"Penny in the air," she grinned. The Doctors face snapped from awe-struck to furious. "Penny drops."

"But River, you've stolen a…"

"On orders from the museum." She said defensively. "Promise."

"But River you don't understand!" he exclaimed. "Put it down!" she frowned at him.

"What? Why?"

"River I'm serious put it down it's activated by a heat equal to that of the human body temperature. PUT. IT. DOWN!" But it had already begun to glow, becoming brighter and brighter with every second that River's hand remained in contact with it. It started to vibrate, shaking violently and just as River dropped it a blinding red light erupted from its top, swallowing them from sight.

Amy froze. Two screams echoed through the Tardis. She sat slowly upright and listened carefully. Then came the sounds of muffled shouting.

"Rory!" she hissed, shaking him awake.

"What?" he grumbled.

"I heard voices." She whispered.

"It's probably just the Doctor talking to himself." He mumbled. Rolling over he begun snoring again . Amy rolled her eyes, and slowly, she reached under the bed for the baseball bat (why the Doctor had placed a baseball bat under their bed in the first place she had no idea) and slowly got up out of bed, and crept down the corridor.

As she reached the control room the voices grew louder. They sounded almost like… but that wasn't possible. But she was right. As she rounded the corner she saw two small children, no older that five or six, yelling at each other. She froze, the base-ball bat clattering to the floor. One, the girl, had wild dark blond curls, and was wearing a wholly inappropriate outfit that Amy could only imagine on a female thief from a movie. The boy she was yelling at, had brown combed hair, and was, quite unmistakably, the Doctor. It was the bow tie that convinced her.

Upon seeing her the children turned, stopped for a second, and started shouting explanation at her.

"Enough!" Amy shouted, silencing them both. "Doctor," she said hastily, "is that you?" He nodded vigorously. "River?" she nodded. "What happened?" At that the shouting commenced once again.

"One at a time!" Amy said. "Doctor?"

"_River_ shrunk us." he said, stressing the name.

"It wasn't my fault!" she insisted. "I didn't know!" Amy held up a hand to silence her and at once she was quiet.

"How did this happen?" she asked.

"River stole that," the doctor said pointing at the fallen orb, " and then she touched it and then it glowed and then it shook and then we were shrunk."

"It wasn't my fault mummy I promise I didn't know!" River insisted.

"Well whose fault was it then?" the doctor demanded sarcastically. " I _told_ you not to touch it and you did anyway!" The two children started shouting at each other again and Amy watched, fixed to the spot, shocked and bewildered.

"Rory!" she shouted over her shoulder. Seconds later Rory appeared at her side and stared confused at the two bickering children.

"What the…?"

"That's the doctor." She pointed, "And that's our daughter." She pointed again. "And that," she pointed this time at the fallen orb. " is the thing that she stole which shrunk them." He stood for a moment, blinking slowly, and looked again from his wife, to his child, to the doctor and the orb, and back again.

"Right." He said. "Okay then." He looked hopefully at his wife. "You got a plan?" he asked.

"Library?" she suggested. He nodded. "And I'll take care of these two." She muttered, looking hesitantly back at River and the Doctor.

The doctor glared at River. He was so unutterably angry, but his small child sized brain could hardly fathom how to communicate this. So he shouted.

"I told you not to touch it!" he shouted. "But you did it anyway! You always do that; you always do what I tell you not to. You always cause trouble!"

"I didn't know it would do that!" she yelled back at him. "You always think I know everything and when I don't you get mad and think I am stupid!"

"You are!" he snapped. He was silent for a minuet, practically shaking with rage.

"All you do," he growl, "all the time, is cause trouble and get us in danger. I wish I'd never met you!" he shouted. River looked at him, too stunned to speak. Then she shoved him hard sending him toppling him over and fled the control room, crying.

Amy glared at the doctor for a moment.

"Stay here." She growled at him. She turned, and ran after her daughter. She found her in one of the rooms near the Library, their room she supposed. River was lying curled up in the middle of the large bed, her little face buried in the pillows, sobbing. Amy sat on the bed and looked at her daughter, at the tiny, miniature version of her daughter. She stroked aside a stray curl from her face and sighed.

"River look at me." But the child continued to cry into the pillow. Amy sighed again. "Melody look at me." She said gently. She turned her head slowly and blinked up at her mother through bleary tear clouded eyes.

"Come here." Amy murmured, scooping the little girl up into her arms. She held her, her daughter, her Melody in her arms as she cried, stroking back her curls which had fallen loose from her pony tail in her skirmish with the doctor.

"You know he didn't mean it don't you?" she murmured softly. "He loves you really. He was just angry and freaked out."

"No he doesn't." River mumbled. " he thinks I only bring trouble." Amy chuckled.

"You do sweetie." She smiled. "But the doctor lives for trouble. Trust me."

"He doesn't love me." She insisted. "Not like daddy loves you." Amy sighed and hugged her tight.

"Yes he does." She said. "River, the doctor has never loved anyone as much as he loves you. And no he doesn't love you like your Father loves me, but that is because he is _nothing_ like your Father. But trust me, when I say he would do _anything _for you." She looked up uncertainly.

"Really?" Amy smiled.

"Really." She said, and kissed her daughter's head, smiling to herself. "Now, I am going to go find him, and drag him in her to make him apologise. And then we are going to find a way to change you back. Okay?" she nodded.

"Okay." Amy smiled and kissed her once more, and left to fin the doctor.

After marching the boy doctor in to apologise to River, she left the two of them in the room and went to look for Rory in the library. He had found the orb in a book detailing Silurian technology. He held open the book and read;

"_Where the purpose of the orb is activated by a heat equal to that of the human blood, it's counter-reaction is activated by the inverse temperature". _Amy looked at him.

"In english?" she blinked.

"It means the opposite of the human body temperature." Rory explained. "So where exposing it to temperature of 37 degrees celsius will revert a person to childhood, exposing it to -37 degrees will change them back."

"How the bloody hell are we supposed to do that?" Amy exclaimed. But then they looked at each other, and two grins spread across their faces simultaneously.

"The freezer." They said. The doctor had never done anything half way. "Moderate" was not a word he comprehended. Everything, including the temperature of the freezer, was extreme.

After pulling on his thickest pair of gloves, Rory removed and emptied one of the trays from the freezer (mostly containing dozens of absurd flavours of ice-cream) and followed Amy who was carrying the orb in its bag, into River and the doctors bedroom.

Walking in they found the two children sleeping, heads together, little chests rising and falling in unison.

"We should have known her like this." Amy said quietly. "We should have been part of her childhood." Rory put his arm around his wife and kissed her temple.

"We were." He said. "Perhaps not in the way we should have been, but we where."

"I know." Amy mumbled. She placed the bag carefully on the flaw and walked quietly over to her sleeping child. She brushed aside a stray curl and gently kissed her forhead.

"I love you Melody Pond." She whispered. "And don't you ever forget it." Then she stepped back and picked up the bag, took out the orb, and placed it into the ice box. A bright red flash engulfed the room, and once it receded, they were presented with the sleeping forms of River and the Doctor. Unconsciously she nestled in closer to him, and he wrapped his long arm protectively around her. Amy smiled as she watched. Everything was as it should be.


End file.
